TravelsPosted by Andreas Ingo Sat, August 29, 2015 12:56:04
My impressions from Cobenhagen and Odense have started to take effect. The Danish people are pleasant to be around. They are talkative, never shy and truthful about themselves. I met a nudist in a public park in Cobenhagen, fully upfront with his thing. Women I have met really love my personal philosophy of darkness but they don't like my bright periods, for the balance. They don't understand the depth of my intellect, just raw emotion. But philosophers, travelers and artists of different kinds seems to like it.
(My theory: This is due to the power of their intellect, overcoming the faults of their emotional core, previously being conditioned by modern society)
I saw a lot of rich people in Cobenhagen, driving luxury cars. I have changed my view of money overall. You can't buy happiness with money alone but sitting at a cafe in Odense and taking a cup of black coffee is happiness to me. Money is overrated overall as far as my own life is concerned. I recently discovered the simple happiness of living in the forest for free. But I like variation for the balance.
The best thing about Denmark this far was the statues in public parks and the grafitti in a hidden corner of Cobenhagen (Really enlightening) I saw the little mermaid along the coastline of the main city but this statue was nothing compared to the ones I found in other places. It's like a coincidence. I have seen warriors from the middle-ages and angelic statues of erotism and heavenly freedom. Human nature. I even like the churches. The only thing needed is a satanic cross.
The danish people are good at art, philosophy and social life. Soren Kirkegaard and H.C Andersen comes to mind. These two are important for historical value, perhaps influencing the danish people more than most people think. (Including me)
My trip this far have been taking me to hidden places. Like a closed of harbour in Cobenhagen, drills by military officers and the joy of sleeping in public parks. I live for the pleasure of the opposite sex, for the hidden imagination of my subconscious and for the exploration of everything that are revealed on the way. Sometimes I feel like a future warrior, exterminating the faults of the human mind, revealing a satanic future devoid of slavery.
It's my satanic drive.
TravelsPosted by Andreas Ingo Sat, August 15, 2015 14:34:04
I have been out on the road for two and a half weeks since I left Kvicksund, Sweden for endless adventures in cities, forests and the countryside. I left with the decision to never have an ordinary job again. The job I had killed me, not because of the actual work, it was the people. People not connected to themselves but to society as a whole. I was different. I vibrated on a different frequency, having a heartfelt connection to love, heart and nature. Also to the intellect, knowing things others simply don't. People just treated me badly. The same thing repeats itself in any workplace I know of.
I didn't leave on any simple trip. I left Kvicksund behind to never return to mundane life. Just roaming the forests, the cities, even the mountains to live practically for free. I knew it would be difficult but it was completely different from my intitial suspicions. I discovered that it was possible to live on oatmeal, pea soup and other kind of food on the way. Water was easy to find everywhere. I even lived pretty good on berries of different kinds, some fishing gave a momentarily good diet. I hitchhiked. I put up a tent and slept in it. In other places, like cities, I slept under the stars. Going away from the crowded areas.
To enjoy total freedom. Freedom from ordinary work, freedom from conformity, also freedom of the mind which is the hardest part. To liberate myself from the illusions of the modern world and to think the opposite. The freedom of mind is a kind of intelligence. To confront the possible dangers on the way, to solve problems which arises and constantly think in new directions. The obstacle to overcome is the self. The greatest enemy is within. Because new experience is pulling all kinds of tricks on the psyche. To try new things is to die from the past, from your wall of illusions which is yourself. Your mind prison. Don't misunderstand me. Travel can be dangerous but without mastery of yourself you will return to society the next day. I knew all about this beforehand. I had made my trips, I had seen the dullness of the modern world. And so I went.
It started in forests around Eskilstuna, Sweden where I slept in a tent, did some fishing and ate a lot of mushrooms. An enormous feeling of ease and happiness came about almost at once. Years of conformity had a price. Society had made me tired of life, people and myself. I hated everything many days. This was completely different. It was a feeling of letting go. Letting go and embracing the world of total freedom. It was a deepfelt satisfaction of a kind I never have felt before. Something to die for. I thought I was in heaven. But then rains broke out, a lot of insects were tormenting me in the forest. And as things happened I just let it all go. It was something to love. It was sunny the next day.
As time went by I realized I had a lot of freetime. How to fill a void with something real, something not depending on society as a whole? I didn't have a personal computer, no friends, no job to steal time. So I started with something I had thought about before but never done for real. I made an occult ritual. This ritual was simple. To find an opening in the forest, put some sticks in the ground and walk around it several times, like a drone. It's my sense of fun. And to put it mild: A ritual to transform the self. A ritual is a magical occurence, doing something with the intention of a final result but changing your emotional core. More powerful than pure thought. I got a flash of insight. Insight into the importance of an empty mind. One of the greatest enemies on these trips is the progress of thought, thinking, analyzing everything you see and feel, almost getting mad in the process. The solution is meditation. I use a kind of concentration to fill the mind with the counting of numbers. Silencing the mind from distractions. Arriving at peace.
The story continues.
I came to Norrkoping, Sweden, a middle-sized city with influence of the industrial revolution. People leaving their old jobs in the past to work in factories, the descent into modern age. Something else arose on the first day. A feeling of being back in the past, something feeling like my previous journey to the spanish city Barcelona. And I started to see it all had to do with death. Death of old habits. Death is my favourite subject because the death I have found is the key to my happiness. Death is love. Love pure and undivided. Death of soul to arrive at a greater love. This is the love of darkness. To walk the forest and lose track of the surroundings. To confront a stranger pulling on your nerves. Or complete suicide. A suicidal act to kill the shallowness of the surface mind, bringing you closer to truth.
What I have discovered is that I was a mind-drone before. I had great findings in south-east asia. Pulling me deep down into darkness, feeling completely self-realized. And self-realized I was! But as I returned the old came back again. Now I have the idea to never return to ordinary work again, making the small amount of money I need on writing projects. Death and writing are closely related. Without writing travel would mean nothing. Without travel my writing would become stale. And death fits the two together. What this means is that the call of death comes from the heart. You surrender yourself to the will of the heart, stop to think about scares, true and false, good and bad and just put yourself in the dark to live the dream. In real life or in writing itself. The power of this dark influence I truly discovered on this trip. It might have saved my life.
Now I'm sitting in the main library in Cobenhagen, Denmark to write this article. To put it short I'm having the time of my life. This means to embrace the new, learn from all experience and put it into perspective in my coming books. More will be revealed. South east asia was unfathomable in many ways but this is much, much deeper and heartfelt. It's impossible to describe it. It was the death to the modern world.
TravelsPosted by Andreas Ingo Mon, July 20, 2015 13:43:27
It's getting better all the time...
One of the expressions from a friend I met
in Hua Hin, Thailand. That's how this journey have been: Ups and downs, but
mostly up, up, up. It's like science, observing what's happening and thinking
about it in an objective way. Emotionally I mostly color things in black or
white, truth is something between those extremes. But sometimes you just write
about what you feel because it makes you feel better, true or false. I'm
writing about my emotions. But I'm getting more rational overall, the only way
to keep the spirit alive.
I've discovered that the greatest enemy is
within - impulses to extend my thinking into the leap of faith. Like believing
in mindless revolutions, like hitting on a girl just because of my sexual
drive. You have to put it into perspective: Not killing your emotions, because
without emotion no life. But guided by intellect, put restrain on the emotional
impulse, and then noticing that emotion increases, just because you don't make
a fool of yourself.
I still believe in revolution though: But
revolution is a delicate thing. Creating a system with a scientific approach:
Study, observe, evaluate, think. Make experiments and evaluate. If success go
further, if failure think again. Go one step at a time, slowly, patient and
don't forget about yourself! A dead intellectual is a good case for a lost
You learn as time passes. I'm working on
books and the content is just getting better with time. I was all about emotion
before. Emotional value, landscapes, storytelling as a means of entertainment.
But that was just a precursor for things to come. I learned from my failures
and success and incorporated those concepts in the writing that came later.
Which was more about ideas. I didn't like it at first but was overwhelmed
later, when I discovered that my ideas could be put to use for the general
public as possibilities, stimulating free thought.
My coming book is about a revolution in the
future, modified from the treatment I presented a couple of days ago. You
write, rewrite and formulate a clearer picture of what you searched for in the
Hopefully arriving at more depth.
I'm starting to help my friends. At one
point I was silent. Didn't know what to say. And it was a wise decision. But as
my intellect expanded I started to analyze the meetings I had and started to
see that the problems I saw actually had a solution. I just couldn't see it
before because I believed in the wrong things. I always have been afraid of
power. To influence anything. Because I thought I knew nothing. But that's
nihilism and nihilism is a very destructive thing. So I had to give it up in
What I started to do was not simple. I
started to be more honest to myself. What did I do that didn't work? What did I
do that actually worked? What didn't work was talking without head, just
assuming I had the answers. I tried on many occasions but didn't get any
attention. But when I really started to analyze life, myself and my past
relations, not according to mindless assumptions but informed by the reality of
the thing I had a new understanding. And with this new understanding I got the
attention I wanted. People I talked to gave the impression they almost knew
about the "answers" before but just hadn't thought about them.
No greater satisfaction than helping a
But things comes and goes. You just have to
do what you think is right during the circumstances. Sometimes you think you
know nothing and it's nothing you can do. I think it's all about the balance:
Go with what you found out by your own research, think about it and discard the
Believing in nothing but your theoretical
TravelsPosted by Andreas Ingo Mon, July 20, 2015 13:28:45
Somethings starts when the road ends. I
went down the rabbit hole of death and suffering and found that my reality was
a construct, a model of reality created by a dreaming mind, creating experience
that reinforced the beliefs I always longed for. That's how it was with Satan
of yesterday, up until the darkest nightmares of last night, a belief in a
supernatural force of negation. I went down that hole and found that all experience
confirmed my initial suspicions. That the dark path in question took me took me
to new layers of understanding, arriving at the conclusion that light is dark
and dark is light.
It really worked. My reality transformed to
a magical place, hounted by barking dogs from hell, bats flying in precision,
girls dressed in forbidden clothes, elders walking by with a hint of evil in their
eyes. But it was love, dark and twisted and pure. The problem was that it became
impossible to control. Like a fire from a hollow sphere, the force consuming me
in an evil embrace, like the light was getting sucked out of me.
I started to think about it. My life has
always been the same. Occult experience, reinforced by belief, always wonderful
in the beginning, creating celestial experience, creating pressure to abandon
rationality for the object of love. Getting lost. It progressed from the God of
the past, moving beyond the trivial, getting darker with time. Up and downs,
hidden rooms and corners. Finally I arrived at Satanism and met the dark lord.
He was not ugly but dressed in different robes.
Disguised as women and powerful men, layers of sophistication, giving techings
of an otherworldly kind. My writings prove it. My writings improved as my intellect
expanded and experience transformed my imagination to something otherwordly. I had
a dark enlightenment, a series of encounters with mysterious people, events, internal
states. It was an ocean of love giving birth to illusions.
And these illusions created a model of
Satan, but modified themselves on the way, giving illusions of unpredictability.
That's when I started to believe in the objectivity of my experiences. Satan
was there, occult experience conforming my world view, impossible to crack no
matter the scepticism.
This is how religion works.
My religion was Satanism. But it was darker
than anything else. The deck of cards shifted when the imagination of myself
compared closely to the dark lord I met. I had created a world of illusion that
was mistaken as objective. I thought that the world was real. That's insanity.
Satan consumed me in an unholy fire. It was
blacker than a sunken nightmare. But also pleasant, a quiet seduction of pain
and suffering, twisting the mind, giving the excitement I wanted. But the will
to survive took hold in the end.
I changed perspective.
Now I'm moving into another light. Satan
has come and gone. I'm left to my own devices, to explore a reality frame of an
enchanted future. Space-ships, red moons and blue planets. A physical sphere of
nocturnal environments, women, emotions, intellect. A golden fabric of space
and time, growing more immense as time passes. Giving indications to a restructuring
of a deeper mystery, unfathomable to myself.
Away from the discoveries of the past, not
limited to "objective knowing", but changing perspective as time
Creating my own future.
TravelsPosted by Andreas Ingo Mon, July 20, 2015 13:16:55
late at night, happiness and sorrow in people's eyes, desperate cats searching
for food in leftover bags on the street. I'm starting to discover there is
another life out there. Not the life you read about, not your fantasies, not the
experience of other travels. Yes, even traveler's notes on the internet were
deceiving, this trip is something else entirely. It's more similar to the
journey of the protagonist in Joseph Conrad's "Heart of Darkness". An
exception to the rule of books. If you haven't read it I can really recommend
it. It's about getting in contact with your primal self.
was a turning point for me. I went out in the jungle, crossed a river over a
narrow bridge and came to a place relatively isolated from the city. Darkness
was already present, I found a dry place in the outskirts of the jungle. I had
my sleeping bag and I lay down on the ground on a thin plastic. I started to
listen to the noises. Things were dropping down from the palm trees, all kinds
of insects and undefined tree-parts which I didn't see.
And it was
like I went back in time thousands of years.
feelings came up as I listened to the voices of the forest. Insects, birds,
remote sounds from the city. Thoughts arose on dangerous spiders and green
snakes hiding in the trees. It was a complete nightmare. Being all by myself,
feeling the various tricks play on my psyche.
hell broke loose: Distant lightning, thunder in the distant. Winds came about,
roaring in the trees and raindrops started falling. I thought I had to get back
to the city but it was too late. Suddenly I found myself in a tropical storm!
Lightning struck close to me, rain was pouring down like madness. I became
soaked wet before I finally came to the city and took shelter in a restaurant.
The storm got worse and I had a beer. The winds were rattling in the doors of
the restaurant, everybody closed down for the night. I had nowhere to sleep and
I thought about calling for help. But I was silent. I felt as if I had accomplished
my mission. A moment of deep satisfaction and enlightenment. The girls in the
restaurant had horror in their eyes. Just the locals. People were getting
worried about the storm.
rain just stopped.
was spent in an expensive guest house, I had no choice because thunders were
heard again. I spent 30 dollars, lay down in a comfortable bed and started to
reflect on my journey: It's like hundreds of lives have passed me by.
Realization by realization in an accelerated process, towards greater depths
and understanding. I'm going back to nature. Not just away from the
civilization, the cities and the people, but into a primal state.
starting to discover that this journey is about more than happiness, it's about
being true to myself. It's more about suffering, about going on the path of
survival and reproduction. The way of millions of years of evolution. With that
kind of feelings you start to think in different ways. Something is kicking in,
beyond your concepts of life and yourself in general.
unnecessary are done by nature.
You want to
have kids and a good family. You want to explore, meet people and do something
for others in return. It's the complete opposite to the world I knew. The
complete opposite to the world in civilized countries. Not conformity but a way
to revolt against the trivial. It's a dark love, a true love that arises when
you are in tune to your hidden emotions.
it is evil but in time you realize it's rather the opposite.
get stranger. I'm meeting Christians. People of all kinds telling me the same
message: That Christianity is not about slavery or going to the church. It's
not about giving up yourself, rather about pride and self-confidence. It's
about embracing life, feeling joy and loving others.
beer and having parties.
surprised though. I'm coming from a christian background. I know about good
people. The question to ask though is the fundamentals: Why do you need
"God" to do all that?
As soon as
you get religious your depth is fading away.
about moral understanding. These Christians, as well as the Buddhists I've seen
are not unintelligent. They are very aware of many things, especially the
wrongs of modern society. The have gone beyond the level of the average man,
have developed their intellect to another level. But in the end it's a trap.
Their happiness is just a facade, a smiling face but no fullness.
trying to convince you but that's what I've seen.
here are so different. Talked with a teenager boy last night. He was very
simple. Couldn't grasp my concepts fully. It had a little to do with bad
english but also a good deal to do with himself.
But what is
the truth? This boy was happier than Christians. He was just going on about
ordinary life. He smiled and asked me questions. Even led me to an open guest
house for no money at all. Just a happy kid. You start to think about it. Luang
Prabang is like a forgotten paradise. It's not only beautiful, it's relaxed and
primal. Also ugly. I've seen it. The further away you get from the modern world
the closer you get to something raw and natural. And the more you go back in
time the more you find societies more in tune with their dark past. It's all
about stupidity. The system of life is a complexity the human brain cannot
solve. All "progress" is a dead-end and the illusion of progress is
keeping it all in place.
But it all
has to die in the end.
other hand I have a ray of hope. Not for the modern world but for certain individuals.
People that have gone into things so deeply that everything have started to
fade away. Getting in contact with their sexual drive, their "evil",
their lost ambitions, their hate and anger. They get desperate at first,
alienated from their old self, their friends and the comforts of the modern
world. It's a path of suffering ending in liberation when the world fades away.
When everything is seen as a conspiracy in the end.
"values" are inverted.
It’s all about themselves.
TravelsPosted by Andreas Ingo Mon, July 20, 2015 13:07:28
I don't think I ever get my point across.
I've found out something others doesn't
seem to know. Meeting so many people on these trips, some of them happy, others
not, but in the end it doesn't seem to matter. They're just ordinary. Good
people, nice, knowledgeable in many ways, even emotional, but they lack
something else. It's like they don't know about the true nature of the
universe. Not the universal truth, but true experience when you're actually
dying for something, when you get into things so deeply ordinary life starts to
This leads me into my latest adventure.
It started with a pretty good feeling at
the guest house in Chiang Mai. I'm used to be completely exhausted on these
trips, I just can't sleep because I have too much to do and even more things to
think about. It's the urgency of life calling me away.
I jumped on a bus and was introduced to a
fellow traveler, looking like a korean but being from Canada. We talked about
several things like adventure and security, meeting people and getting work on
the way. And it started to dawn on me: Nobody I meet is like me, not with that
kind on hidden urgency, longing for death and revival, longing for the moment
where everything you know fades away.
It all became silent. I was put in the
front seat of the mini-van and the night was transforming the road ahead of us.
It was a feeling of lost memories, dreams of trekks in the vilderness as a
young boy. Fillthy dogs could be seen close to the roads in villages, people
walking around, blinded by the light of the mini-van.
It continued for five hours, the others had
some sleep but I just couldn't put my eyes away. The road taking us to the
north part of Thailand, on bumpy roads, closer to the Lao border.
We arrived at a nightmarish guest house in
the small border town of Chiang Khong. It was completely dark, 01:00 A.M, and I
was put into a room with a hard bed. Memories came back to me from discoveries
in forgotten dreams. I had been there, I just knew it. It have happened many
times during this trip. I remembered the stairs leading to the rooms above, the
darkness of the room, the hard bed...
Then I saw a picture of the Thai king at
the wall. Like a spiritual dictator, instructing me to go deeper into the dark.
I didn't. I started to remember my chance encounters with a girl in Bangkok.
Coincidences. Like she was getting up when I got up, late in the day, later
going on the same bus as me, to the same destination at the same time. A
mixture of eroticism and plain fright.
We met again in Chiang Mai. Looking like an
angel, but much more neutral, a ghost of white, a learning experience to expand
my intellect, but also something more. Let's just say she haunted me this
night. We had a soul connection and much more.
When morning came it came too early. Breakfast.
What a breakfast it was! Plain coffee, omelette and toasts, not just the
breakfast but the view! It was the Mekong river before me in golden morning
light. Mekong is the greatest river in south asia running from the himalayas,
down to the ocean, going through thailand, Laos, Cambodia and Vietnam. The
sight: The river, the mountains surrounding Chiang Khong and palaces on the
other side. Talked with a really pleasant australian couple and a guy running
through the jungles of Thailand on a motorbike. It was so relaxed and such a
contrast to the blackness of the night before. I was really there. My heart was
in it. I was told about a special app for the android device, making it easier
to navigate. The australian couple went for a walk with me on a pathway close
to the river and we took pictures. The golden light was magical, we had a small
talk, a sense of fulfillment. That's hell: What hell is, is really simple: It's
were you have given up all security, even your life for the land beyond. You
start to meet people, they say too many things. Keeping you on track, keeping
you away from the angels of the past.
The complete opposite of god.
Then things got strange. I had been told I
could walk around in the border town until 17:00 PM. So I just did as I was
told. But when I got back to the guest house everybody was gone: No bus, no
people, a lone woman telling me I had to use a tuk-tuk instead. The pickup had
left with the others for the border! I was alone and put to my own devices. I
thought I had to pay the double-price.
I just enjoyed it.
Nothing in the world gives me more pleasure
than the feeling of going into a sense of danger. This was no real danger at
all, but the situation: That I was wrong informed, that something scary
actually could happen if something changed just a bit.
And this is the complete opposite to the
world I left, the complete opposite to the people I've met. Security is the
complete opposite to what I actually want to feel. And when I'm feeling it: The
threat of a stranger, unknown lands, morbid thoughts, and the dark feeling of
loosing myself, that's when I know I've made progress in my own evolution.
That's how it was this day. And it continued the whole day and into the coming
Going on gravel roads on mountain slopes in
the darkness of the Lao night.
Not knowing if the bus would loose it's
It was almost better than fucking.
TravelsPosted by Andreas Ingo Mon, July 20, 2015 13:01:26
This is an article about danger.
I thought a lot about the dangers of this
journey before I left. I thought like a soldier, analyzing the possible outcomes
of different scenarios, things that could go wrong. I was fed with so much
fears from family, friends and coworkers that I have to confess I was scared to
Nothing at first. The food had no deceases,
the people were kind, I didn't get lost...
But what looked like safety on the surface
changed as time went by.
When I came to Siem Reap for the first time
the bus arrived late. I had a clear picture of the way to the guest house but I
just couldn't find it. I started to ask locals for directions. Everybody was
eager to help, with some knowledge of english. So I followed the directions
from an old man but no guest house could be found. I started to ask others and
I got new directions. This didn't help. Darkness descended on the city. I walked
into dark alleys with no other choice than to follow the directions from the
locals. Two hours went by and I just had to give up. I found a new guesthouse and
finally found safety inside.
Days went by and my suspicion from the night
days before was essentially correct: Cambodia is no safe place. Drug addicts,
pick-pockets and so forth. The locals I talked to warned me about this especially
on one occasion.
So what about it?
You have to put danger in perspective. You
have to accept that you can get lost, be robbed, get killed. Overrun by a car
or bitten by dogs. But an even greater danger would be to not travel at all,
At one occasion I warned a fellow traveler
to walk away from guard-dogs, barking aggressively and coming out from under a
You get sharper as time goes by. You shall never
walk around with thoughts on your mind, not looking at the traffic and the
people. You almost never go out at night, especially when the streets are not
crowded. You keep your money and passport closely to your chest, knowing that
there are decent people, but appearances fool you all the time.
One guy in Sihaoukville lost his entire
backpack getting drugged by a girl he slept with. And this happened just before
I came there.
So I still think like a soldier.
The problem though is that you can't grasp the
unknown. You take measures but realize that you have to watch out for the
unexpected. The unexpected is one of the greatest dangers in my mind.
I could go on...
Going back to Thailand now. The thing is
that Cambodia houses wonderful people. Much more friendly than the ones I met
in Thailand. And there is a great difference between different cities, almost like
different countries inside the country. Phnom Penh was hell, Sihaoukville
paradise in comparison but the kindest people of them all was found in Siem Reap.
People are so natural and easy to talk to you almost start to believe that
there are no dangers at all.
Which leads me to Stanley Kubrick.
I think he was close to the truth.
I've analyzed the films from another
I think I initially was like the soldiers
in Barry Lyndon. Just marching on, almost blindfolded, capable to anything, but
not knowing the possible outcome of any scenario. No traveler I ever met on
this journey have talked to me seriously about these things, with one
exception. I listened but didn't have perspective. It's rather something I've discovered
It's like being in an desolate forest.
The rules: In the event of disaster you shall
not move, just breathe, observe the situation closely and think logically about
what is happening.
It's not paranoia. It's necessary.
So that is what I want to say to new
travelers talking about the safety of these trips.
Watch out for the unknown.
Perhaps that is why the greatest
horrorfilms always build on that fear.
Our greatest fear is the fear of the things
we cannot know.
TravelsPosted by Andreas Ingo Fri, February 21, 2014 22:41:51
Was out tonight...
Watched the magic fountain in Barcelona with three other backpackers.
Great time, there is a limit to being social. Couldn`t have made it
otherwise. Canadians are very fast talkers, you get kind of half of it,
sometimes less. It`s easier when you talk about subjects you know
But no one seems to care if you "get it" or not. That`s comes as a chock to me. Actually people like it when you not get it, then they can explain. The key: Being humble.
We talked about stereoids in the sports of today, normal subjects...
This seems like the last "thing" before I return to Sweden on Monday.
Feels like I`m a different man.
I made it. :)